Thursday, June 5, 2008

*Everyday Chatter

Alt Coffee, which became Hopscotch, on Ave A has shuttered. Guess the move from heroin addicts to strollers didn't pan out as they bid farewell to their "loyal customers, pain in the arse regulars, disco ball lovers, and neighborhood freaks." As I was snapping this pic, a girl walked by and said, "Wow, looks like they really cleaned up this whole area!"


"Slapdicks" (aka yunnies) in the Meatpacking District clubs are slathering their bodies with Preparation H to help them get laid. Here's the satire part of the story: "I think the shit doesn’t even work, because if it did, these club assholes would all disappear. It’s supposed to get rid of hemorrhoids, isn’t it?" Yeah! [Clublife]

Again, the unabashed yunnies state their very clear intentions for the East Village: "we're going to fill his neighborhood whether he likes it or not," vowed one juvenile GOPer. "We're coming with briefcases and BlackBerrys in hand to stake our claim." [Post]

A commenter asked about vanishing record shops--check out a few of them here. [Stupefaction]

If you haven't read Anthony Lane's amazing slam of the SATC movie, you must. A few choice words: "Aryan real estate...hormonal hobbits...stale Puritanism...Babylonian orgy of spending." That about sums up the new New York. [NYer]

Protest the Vongerichtification of Union Square Park tonight! [Curbed]

12 comments:

treshold75 said...

It used to be called "putting a Starbucks on every half-block." Now it's "Vongerichtification." I wonder why no one saw this coming...Damn, I miss New York!

z. said...

Damn. Every freakin' day there's more bad news.

kane said...

Vanishing New York, indeed.

Joshua said...

I went and read the “slapdicks” story, that Clublife is quite a fun blog! A bouncer writing abut his experiences handling drunk, high, disorderly yunnies at the nightclubs they congregate in. Everyone here should read those stories to see just how bright our best&brightest are these days. None of that "polite, hardworking, educated, etc" stuff there!
Anyway, when I first read that Preperation H thing, I asked myself: Why, because it makes their skin tighten so they look muscular? Well, apparently that's exactly it, though they put it more scientifically, claiming that it "pulls excess water from the skin", which I guess is a nicer way to put it. So, just envision a puckered anus and you'll get the idea.
Boy, the latest hipster accessory: a tube of Preparation H. How much more hip can they get?

Though I guess when you think about it, one of the drawbacks to the metrosexual lifestyle (besides hepatitis) is that having absolutely no body hair makes you look either like a child, or someone with a hormone disorder. So I guess this is there way of compensating.

KnicksBasketballNY said...

Soon things may get to the point where we will look back at the summer of 2008 as the "good old days."

anon. said...

No, KnicksBasketballNY, during the summer of 2008, we will be looking back to the "good old days" that were in summer of 1998.

Rx said...

"We're coming with briefcases and BlackBerrys in hand to stake our claim."

Sounds like the unmistakable declaration of a class war. What do you think, and what should be done about it?

Joshua said...

That's a good question, Rx. For the present, I myself would recommend just to keep supporting people like Jeremiah (you'll notice criticism seems to offend these yunnie kids about as much as anything), while simultaneously spreading awareness of the issues regarding gentrification among friends, family, and aquaintences.
In the long run, I would suggest to join or support groups working towards progressive ends, with a focus on class issues.
Regarding class issues, I recommend you check out the website www.wsws.org (this week they have a review of the SATC movie which is most enjoyable).

Anonymous said...

That Prep H story made my night! I'm happy the men are doing just as much to humiliate themselves as the botoxed and primped up women. - BN

BaHa said...

Joshua, can't find the review at the wsws site. Link, please?

Rx said...

The fastest way to the SATC review @ WSWS is to go find the Arts Review link (homepage, left column), open that, then find David Walsh and open that link. The review is right at the top.

I've been reading Walsh for a long time and I recommend him for the sharpness of his criticism.

Joshua said...

Sorry about the delay answering your question, BaHa (very hectic weekend).
The full link for the SATC movie review is: http://wsws.org/articles/2008/june2008/sex-j05.shtml
Rx is right though, it's much faster to use his directions than to type all that in.
Hope you enjoy it!