Tuesday, April 1, 2008

*Everyday Chatter: April Fool's

The Empire State Building is being gutted, revitalized, rebuilt, and converted into luxury condos...

...April Fool's! But, you have to admit, it could happen.

Bellevue Hospital's super-spooky, totally haunted psychiatric hospital is being converted into a luxury hotel...

photo credit
No fooling. [Observer]

Yesterday, I broke the news that the Cheyenne is closing. But now Jerry Lewis, whose autographed picture hangs on the wall of the diner with the "greatest egg cremies in the world," has pledged to save the Cheyenne from destruction...

April Fool's. Nothing can save the Cheyenne. Unless Michael Perlman comes to the rescue, according to Urbanite. Until then, its last day will be Sunday. Today, the Daily News pounced on the story and filled in the details: The diner was pushed out by another diner, the Skylight, and the same people who are reopening the Market Diner! Last night I went by for my last meal--see pics here.

When Congestion Pricing fails to dissuade the poor from entering Manhattan, Bloomberg will go to Plan B: He's personally hiring the National Guard to build a wall around Manhattan to keep out the riff-raff... April Fool's! But how long before the city becomes a gated community for the super-rich?

Madonna is bored out of her mind when she visits the new, super-gentrified, soul-sucked New York... No fooling. She says, "It's not the exciting place it used to be...it doesn't feel alive." [Gothamist]

Trump Soho, plagued by disaster, ghostly curses, and voodoo jinxes, will be abandoned by the Donald and converted to low- to middle-income artist housing... April Fool's. But you must read this article that chronicles the shitstorm that is Trump Soho. [NY Mag]

NYU is trying to kick Met Foods out of the East Village, where it is one of the only places for senior citizens and people on a budget to afford grocery shopping...


Let your voice be heard about this potential shutdown of Met Foods at the CB3 meeting Tuesday, April 15, 6:30 p.m., at Project Renewal, Kenton Hall, 333 Bowery (bet 2nd and 3rd). At last week's meeting with NYU, writes neighborhood advocate David Mulkins, "Some 75 or more residents filled to overflowing the space we were meeting in, and NYU heard loud and clear that 'this is just the beginning': we will not let the university make further destructive moves into our neighborhood's quality of life." ... They will also be discussing retail plans for Avalon Bay, so don't miss it.

17 comments:

erice said...

The O'Toole building, along with eight other historic buildings, are under consideration to be demolished to make way for the development of the St. Vincent’s Hospital Manhattan in Greenwich Village. http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/01/nyregion/01historic.html?_r=1&ref=nyregion&pagewanted=print

If these soulless bastards are turning psychiatric institutions, hospitals, etc. into condos, where would they place the sick (physically and mentally)? Oh, wait, I guess, these condos will be the narcissist's own Private Idaho.

EV Grieve said...

Also, I hear that NYU officials are in deep discussions to buy Tompkins Square Park ("a colossal waste of space" one NYU trustee said) to make way for the world's largest dormitory, which will include retail space with items exclusively for people who earn more than $90,000 a year.

Jeremiah Moss said...

hey grieve, you're supposed to say "april fool's!" after a humdinger like that...right?

Grieve said...

Oops! Right. Sorry! April Fool's! Heh.

Jeremiah Moss said...

whew! when it comes to nyu, you just never know...

Anonymous said...

MSM is knicker-twisting re: Madonna's comment about NYC. NYC is a graveyard of tall, glass tombstones, nothing more. Get DVD "NY in the Fifties" or "Breakfast at Tiffany's" to see NYC. If celebs are finding NYC drab, isn't that akin to those furry things, running down the rope, leaving the ship?

Anonymous said...

Great Trump article. That's one spooky place!

erencin said...

Is the blog about NYU kicking MET food out of the E. Village an April fool's story? -- please, say it is so (an April Fool's, that is)

Jeremiah Moss said...

no fooling, nyu is considering kicking out met foods. go to the april 15 meeting and let them know the score.

Anonymous said...

Golden children, St. Pat's is to become a mall for religious bling. Rock Centre will be hotel complex w/ Depression theme. Actors, gotta eat, will form faux bread lines on 6th. Rink will have Sig & Roy's tigers on ice & sounds of Celine D & Debbie R offering choice Andrew LW. 666 5th, Christian broadcasting center. Saks, a historical landmark. April fool? Nightmare? Reality check? You do the math. Or the meth.

Anonymous said...

If Madonna thinks NYC has lost its creativity, remind her of all the NEW shows on the boards: Gypsy, Sunday in Park with George, Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, South Pacific and more .....

BaHa said...

In the old Ratner's space? The old Ratner's space is on Delancey.

Jeremiah Moss said...

there was also a ratner's deli on 2nd ave, in the met food space. the "R" is still in the floor when you walk in--check it out.

BaHa said...

Perhaps an unrelated Ratner's or another establishment that began with an R. According to the Ratner's Meatless Cookbook, the restaurant's first location was on Pitt Street. In 1918, it moved to 138 Delancey Street, which was its final, and only location. By the way, Ratner's was not a deli; it was a dairy restaurant. Delis serve meat, which Ratner's did not.

Anonymous said...

Addendum to my 4/1 remark: would someone alert Madonna that the musical Camelot will be on the boards! Isn't anyone creating anything new?

Anonymous said...

Prediction: The Empire State Building April Fools will be come a reality within 5 years. Lots of Ben Katchoreque businesses still in there , no doubt, ready to be visited by JVNY.

Anonymous said...

BaHa

Jeremiah Moss is correct.

There was a dairy restaurant called Ratner's there, and it was the same owner as the one on Delancey.