Young Urban Narcissists

VANISHING? Unfortunately not.

New York City is being destroyed, block by block, building by building. Who are the people responsible for this? What do they want and what do they fear? The following helps us to begin answering these important questions:

- Racked cites a poll from blog Harlem Fur where many of the readers are desperate for familiar, fast-food chains like Chipotle to open up in the neighborhood. Says one: "What we need [is] actually a Starbucks on 116th and Lenox...[but] I guess I will have to hoof it on up to 125th to get my Starbucks as opposed to other neighborhoods where there is a Starbucks on every other block."

- This screed from Gawker provides a great amount of insight into the psychopathology of these types. Writes one commenter: "I'm all for gentrification. There's a big kerfuffle in my neighborhood about a new Starbucks and I'd like to tell all the self-important tools lecturing us about mom-n-pop perfection to eat a dick."



From the information in these links (*especially in the comments sections), and from experiences in the streets, we can see that these types are terrified of the unfamiliar and cling to the known. When in unfamiliar settings, separated from their soothing cellular phones and forced to stand in line with nothing to do but think, they become extremely anxious. This anxiety, an irrational fear of annihilation, sends them into a primitive, infantile rage.

These people are Young Urban Narcissists, or Yunnies. A narcissistic personality is essentially created by inconsistent, frustrating parents. It makes sense that Yunnies would be attracted to the consistent and the gratifying. Chain stores like Starbucks and Walgreens promise both--the Yunnies always know what to expect and are rarely disappointed. The giant condo complexes they live in offer round-the-clock services and gratify their infantile needs.



Yunnies are the perfect neighborhood destruction machines due to their lack of empathy, sense of entitlement, and contempt for those "beneath" them. Their rage against mom-&-pop shops, I believe, comes in part from the very name "mom & pop," which arouses their envy, reminding them of the "bad object" parents of their infancy. The fallible humanity of these shops inevitably disappoints and frustrates the Yunnies. "What do you mean you're out of skim milk?" they tantrum, and "I can take my dog wherever I want!"

Watch out. Arm yourself with the facts about Yunnies:
- They feel cut off from real human connection so they create constant pseudo-connections via cell phones or Blackberries.
- They feel empty and express their aggression through oral rage, shopping compulsively and consuming aggressively.
- They are grandiose and believe the world revolves around them.
- They demand constant attention--shouting into cell phones and making dramatic scenes is a favorite way to draw attention to themselves.
- Their hidden, deep belief in their own worthlessness makes them strive for high-status jobs and condo lifestyles, where a false sense of power temporarily lifts them up.
- At the extreme end, Yunnies are sociopathic, without conscience and without remorse--these are the most dangerous and, I believe, the fastest growing subgroup.



As for advice on how to deal with Yunnies, all you can do is protect yourself and the neighborhood you love. Every chance you get, let them know that New York is not their personal playground. Maintain strong boundaries and enforce social rules:

1. Say no to their demands and don't give in. Don't argue, don't debate. Just say no.
2. Don't allow them to get away with antisocial behavior: i.e., not picking up their dogshit, cutting in line, texting at the movies, yelling at cashiers, running people over with their giant baby strollers, etc.
3. When most frustrated by Yunnies, glare at them or laugh at them. Your contempt will cut straight to the core of their abysmal self esteem.

FURTHER READING:

• Clone Wars of NY
• The Art of Losing
• Autumn in NY
• Panopticon Metropolis